Do you want to learn how to make a good conversation with other people and how to make it more longer than it was before? If the answer is yes then you are in the right place! For people who dont usually talk too much, this is really challenging for them because they do not always practice talking to other people and i know that because i was there before, i was not really a talkative person when i was younger, because i only lock myself up to my room and it is really not helping me to become more good at conversations, so if you dont want to be like me, here are the tips you must know.
I learn this when i was trying some online video chat, and i want you to learn this too.
Ways to Make a Good Conversation Last Long
Always think that Conversation is not About You
Yes you read thats right! Have you ever tried talking to someone and you didnt got an interest talking about what that person was talking about because that person always talk about his/her interest and not yours? If you already experience this kind of situations, then it has a big possibility too that it will also happen to that person who you are talking too when you always talk about your life and not about that persons life.
The best conversations begin with showing an interest in the other person, their world, and what they might be interested in. Most people love to talk about themselves. Ask them an open-ended question about something that you notice about them. If you can give them a sincere compliment or give them positive feedback, you’ve made a great start. Great conversationalists have a sincere interest in others, notice things about them, and use these things to start and fuel their conversations.
If you dont know what to ask them then try this following questions that i have provided:
Give someone a compliment and tie it to a question.
~That is a very nice sweater. Do you mind sharing where you got it?
~I love your hair. Do you have a favorite salon?
~Your lunch looks delicious. Did you make it yourself?
2. Start a general conversation but make sure you are sharing too so that it doesn’t feel like an interrogation.
~How are you?
~What do you think of this weather?
~Have you read any good books recently?
~What have you been up to since I last saw you?
3. Ask open ended questions.
~Do you like sports?
~Where do/did you go to college? What is/was your major?
~How do you like to spend your weekends?
~Do you enjoy reading?
4. Ask “If you could only” questions.
~What are the three things you would take with you to a deserted island?
~You can only eat five different foods for the rest of your life, what are they?
~If you could pick anyone, who would you like to spend an afternoon with?
~You are stuck in a cabin for two years. What five books would you take with you?
5. Here are some first date ice-breakers.
~Where did you grow up?
~What was it like growing up in your family?
~Are you a cat or dog person?
~Do you like to read? Do you like movies?
~Who is your favorite actor?
6. Start a conversation at work.
~How was your weekend?
~What is your favorite lunch restaurant?
~Is it cold/hot in here or is it just me?
~How is your day going? Are you busy?
~Do you have a vacation planned?
7. Find a common ground.
~What kind of music do you listen to?
~Who is your favorite author?
~Do you like to go to concerts?
~Do you like to travel?
~Have you been in other countries before?
~Describe your dream vacation.
8. “Would you rather” questions.
~Would you rather go without your smartphone or without a car for a month?
~Would you rather be really busy in a job you love or be able to slack off at a job you are only vaguely interested in?
~Would you rather be the most popular person or the smartest person in your social group?
~Would you rather be the worst person on a great team or the best person on a good team?
9. Let’s get serious.
~If you were granted 3 wishes, but you couldn’t use them to wish for material things, what would you wish for?
~Who has had the most influence on creating you as a person?
~Describe the happiest day of your life.
~Are people basically born good or bad?
~What quality do you like best in yourself?
~If you could choose your own first name, what would you choose and why?
10. Use the S.O.F.T.E.N. technique to help create a great non-verbal impression.
~Open up your posture
~Touch by shaking hands
~Nod when the other person talks
Practice Active Listening
Listening is your greatest weapon if you want to make a good and long conversation, the purpose why people are talking to you is for you to listen to them, this will guide you so that you wont be out of the topic when having some conversation with other people, and people specially woman loves a person who knows how to listen, this will make your conversation longer. I know that you also have your own thoughts in adding up in a conversation and you just need to save that for later.
Just relax and just listen to that person and react on some little things is already consider that you are listening and is one way to make a conversation longer.
Consider some Time and Space
Never start a conversation beyond exchanging quick pleasantries unless you have the time to hear the other person out. Places that are noisy with a lot of people around are not the best places to engage in great conversation. Good conversation requires a slow, relaxed pace and a pressure and free atmosphere free of distractions. Coffee shops are ideally great for this purpose.
Following this tips and be you is already enough to make a conversation long, the idea here is to listen first before trying to push multiple questions on that person is the right way to make a conversation long. I hope this had help you and i wish i answer some of your question. And good luck to you.